This morning we had a small lie in, knowing we had an all nighter ahead of us. We still hadn’t booked a boat to get to koh phangnan because we were waiting to see if the boat coming back to Koh Tao at 3am was running….. turned out this had been cancelled so our only option was to get the last ferry at 530pm and return on the first ferry the next day at 840am. Are we too old for this kind of thing?????
By the time we had sorted a boat it was heading towards 2pm so we did the sensible thing and got a kip before the pick up at 4.30pm
At the ferry port there were lots of groups heading on the same ferry, couples, young groups, older groups. Some people had started drinking already, again the sensible oldies we were on the water, tonight was definitely a marathon not a sprint. Ferry too, just over 1 hour, not a lot to report.luckily our ferry ticket included a minibus transfer, roughly around half an hour to the beach. As we approached there were more and more neon shops, body painters and the crowds were getting bigger. Were were dropped at so,e car park and told this would be the pick up point between 5-6am for the ferry back in the morning. It was very non descript but we found a nearby school as a marker. We didn’t bother heading into the beach just yet, it was only 7pm so we walked up the road people watching, and looking for somewhere to get food. The party was attracting so many different types of people, from 6yearolds with their families to pensioners, everyone had one thing in common, they were dressed in full moon gear, and neon paint. We have been saying all holiday that we must get matching tops as this is what many Chinese couples wear, tonight may have to be night.
We settled on a meal in a street kitchen that was really very busy. 9m.y huge tables for 10 people were left so we were joined by 10 Canadians, all our age and out celebrating their 30ths. One of the guys was really confident, he owned man online businesses and nightclubs and was clearly very well off, but he knew it. He was telling us he had just flown in from the Maldives where he had stayed in the most prestigious hotel but he had kicked up a fuss because a waiter winked at his girlfriend. We sat for over an hour chatting before this guy realised the food was taking a lifetime and that other people were walking in and getting served. He started kicking Up a fuss here too, although he had a point it was very embarrassing, particularly considering the price of an average meal was just£2. He definitely had small man syndrome! Half his group walked out as the food arrived saying they would go somewhere else. I just ate mine, paid and left.
Next stop was the T-shirt shop. David has a small obsession with vest tops, he chose one and tried at least 4 others on too, before settling on one design. Our luck was in, they had one for me to match. Done.
The final preparation was the neon paint. This was a scream, we were too tight to get painted professionally because each design was a fiver, more than our meal cost, but there were stands advertising paint yourselves for £1. The problem was that neither of us are very artistic, but the lady soon set her eyes on David and before he knew it he was absolutely covered. I attempted to draw a swan on his bicep because I keep joking with him that he needs a vet; his swans looked sick. But it turned out more like a standard duck. My swan was much more effective 😂.
The street was lined with stalls selling buckets of alcohol, there were 2 options, a sealed bottle of spirit and one mixer, or the cheaper option, a prepoured spirit and mixer. Again our old sensible selves, along with reading horror stories of the cheap option actually being ethanol we went into seven eleven supermarket and made up our own buckets with vodka and coke, and for a fraction of the price.
Once on the beach the crowds were gathering, all the bars playing a different style of music, we walked from one end to the other until we found David’s favourite thing to watch- the fire jump rope. Whoever thought this was a good idea was definitely on something, as just the people giving it a go. They basically get a really big rope and soak it in petrol before setting it alight and seeing who can skip into it. It was only a ,after of time until someone messed up and everyone in the middle got whipped with the burning flames. There was sometimes 6people in and often crack people over the face or get tangled in their legs, but people would go back in for another go, with their long hair down, holding their vodka……..literally playing with fire.
The toilets were chargeable so we went once and then it was joining everyone else on the beach peeing into the sea, we managed to find a quiet rock to pee whereas no one else was caring, pants down and pee into the sea in full view of the crowds.
We had good fun, another drinks trip to seven eleven, some more fire games to watch, including limbo on fire, jumping through fire hoops, and lots of fire jugglers.
We managed until about 230am when we started to have enough, people were passing out on the beach, glass and straws all over, people swimming in the sea that people were peeing in. Carnage! We had another 3 hours before the bus, it was difficult to keep going, without laying down to sleep on the beach.
Finally 5am came And we went to the pickup point, only to wait over an hour for the minibus. Grumpy David was making an appearance. A guy approached us saying he had just been robbed and had to get to koh samui, unfortunately we couldn’t point him in the right direction. It’s not surprising people get robbed, so man6 opportunities when people let their guard down! Once the minibus arrived the driver was letting random people on the minibus before the people booked on, this meant there wasn’t enough seats. We pushed our way to the front true Asian style and got on.
There was a 2 hour wait at the ferry terminal, all benches were taken over by sleeping bodies in neon clothes. David started to feel awful and just wanted back, even a cheese toastie didn’t do the trick! A British couple pulled out on a moped with a distraught girl who was in a mess, cut feet, exhausted. They had found her crying on the side of the road, separated from her group, no phone, no money, no ferry ticket. A lady let her use her phone to try and contact someone via Facebook, no one was answering. We bought her a bottle of water, and the couple took her to try and get her onto the ferry to take her home. As we got on our ferry we saw that she had thankfully been reunited. Just another full moon horror story!
The ferry was full but fine, when getting off at Koh Tao at the other end there was a huge line of people waiting to board, all laughing and staring at the state of us all….. biggest walk of shame ever!
Food, shower, bed in that order!!!
South East Asia 2019 